Horrible News! stop. Bats on Strike! stop. Ryan Raburn "forcing it". stop. Wait, what? stop.

Angry bat takes courageous pro-bat union stance!

Tonight the Tigers bats tried to unionize, after games and games of being abused. Being used to hit balls and generate "offense", the Tiger bats decided that this intolerable behavior must stop... well, every bat except Ryan Raburn's bats. Those things have never touched a ball, ever, because he's "forcing it" - where it is sucking and forcing is always.

Tigers drop a 4th, count it, 4th game during the R-O-D's existence. This is unacceptable! Bad Tigers! BAD!