The All Star Break is Awful

No more ASB crap!

Off Day Procrastination: ASK RYAN - The New Class!

OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Hi kids! It's me, your pal Ryan Raburn! I am not playing baseball so I decided to answer more of your questions! People sure are mean to me. I mean, I may not be the best baseball player in the world, but golly gee-willickers, I'm a major league baseball player! I hit a grand slam the other day and nearly didn't get picked off at third base. Like I always say: teach a man to walk in a straight line, make him somewhat capable. But lead a man off third by about a mile and that man will never be forgotten! Let's answer some questions.

Hey, Reighbourne! Why do you have my picture on your van? Don Kelly - MAILBAG WIZARD!

Hi Don! Wizards are supposed to be on the sides of vans, duh! Except those Hairy Pothead guys. Pot is bad! You know what else is bad? People who boo me after I strike out! I only tried it once with Bobby Higginson when it was Bum Night in Comerica. I said I was sorry!

Dear Ryan,

I hate you. Please change your last name.

Your mother.

Hi mom! Why don't you return my phone calls? Is it because I ran over your dog while trying to navigate the closet. I said I was sorry!

Mr. Raburn,

My name is Nick Punto... er, Pick Nunto. I wish I were as tall as you. I drink my vitamins and take my milk, but I am still just a rat in a human boy's body. I can somewhat field a baseball and Satan disavows my existence. Tell me, what can I do to be as loathed as you. 

Your bestest pal: Nick Punto... er Don Kelly - NOT NICK PUNTO WIZARD

Hi Don! Why won't you return my phone calls? Is it because I called you Josh Wilson? I said I was sorry!

If this van's a rocking, it means a man is openly weeping inside.

Well, kids, it is time for me to get in my van and go to the magical world of mediocrity! Bye for now!

Tigers Lost Yesterday But I Drew a Van Today!

No one asked but Ryan begged me to show off his bitchin' van!

At the moment of this post the Tigers and Dodgers are tied 1-1! However, I am more interested in showing off Ryan "ERROR WUNDERKIND/RELIANT K" Raburn's bitching van (note lack of windows) instead of waiting to recap the game. Recapping is so last week!

Instead I will post a couple of bad pictures and bask in the adulation of the tens of tens of R-O-D fan(s). Yes. The R-O-D has more than one fan (supposedly). We're going places! The Tigers are lucky to have me as a inept MS Paint using fan, yes siree bob! Did I mention I dislike Ryan Raburn? I didn't? Oh well!

Hello semi-retarded bird!

So here's an alternate, old Baltimore Orioles logo, dedicated to an internet pal! I hope you like crappy MS Paint, internet friend!